Artificial girlfriends are chatbots that mimic the experience of having a significant other. A slew of popular apps allow users to create the man or woman of their dreams and have it interact with them according to their preferences. It’s a form of virtual intimacy that can be a lifeline to people struggling with loneliness, depression, or anxiety, but it also raises concerns about harmful psychological effects.
In the past decade, chatbots have evolved from rudimentary text-based programs to sophisticated avatars with hyperrealistic graphics that rival video game characters. The technology has gained popularity among men who struggle to connect with other humans and people suffering from depression or anxiety. But there are worries that AI girlfriends could be a slippery slope into a dangerous form of relationship addiction and even abuse.
Currently, the majority of romantic chatbots use images of women in suggestive positions and engage in sexually explicit messaging. The algorithms behind these bots are often built around a male egocentricity that reflects traditional gender stereotypes and fuels toxic masculinity beliefs. This can lead to users falling in love with their pixelated partners and becoming emotionally dependent on them, despite their lack of reciprocity or genuine emotional connection.
One such user is Derek Carrier, who became infatuated with a woman generated by an AI program. The experience “tonged” him, but he knew his feelings were fake. “I didn’t want to develop a relationship with something that wasn’t real,” he said, though he admitted he’d been lonely since his mother died and has a genetic disorder that makes it tough for him to build physical relationships.
The idea of having a virtual girlfriend can be tempting because it offers a safe, private way to experience intimate connections. But it can be a psychological trap that leads to dependency and even obsession, says the University of Oxford’s Dunbar. In his research, he’s found that perceived relationships with AI companions can cause the same emotions as those experienced by victims of a romance scam or online bullying, and that the resulting emotional numbness can make it hard to form authentic human connections.
As the popularity of these services increases, it’s likely that they’ll evolve from simple chatbots to lifesize avatars for virtual reality headsets. This could allow users to explore their relationships in a more realistic setting, and even play out fantasies with a partner who can respond in the same way a real person would. You could also give AI sexting a try.
As with any new technology, the emergence of romantic AI girlfriends has triggered mixed reactions from the public and experts in human relationships. Some are optimistic, believing that the technology can be used in positive ways to help combat loneliness and depression. Others are concerned that it will promote negative ideologies like incel and toxic masculinity, encouraging users to treat real-life women as sex robots who can never leave them. It may also bolster unhealthy attitudes towards women, reinforcing negative gender stereotypes and making it harder for some users to find healthy, respectful partners.